Too Many Doors chapter 4



Jordan kissed Stacie then spoke “Call me later okay beautiful?” “okay J” “have a great night Stace” “you too, thanks for spending the day with me.” “ha thanks for having me.” “ha no thanks for having me again and again.” “ha anytime night” “night”. Jordan left and got in a cab.

She pulled up to Lynn’s and went to the door. Lynn looked through the peep hole. Jordan spoke “Hey Lynn its J ok?” “okay” Lynn opened the door. “come in” Jordan did and Lynn closed the door. Jordan spoke anxiously pacing “how are you?” “uh ok” Jordan paused looking at Lynn “Is it ok I came by?” “of course.” “ok good. So do you need anything?” Lynn stepped back crossing her arms “no uh I’m sorry were you busy earlier when I called. sorry I text so much I’m guessing you just got free?” Jordan shoved her hands in her pockets and spoke “uh yeah sorry just looked at my phone half an hour ago.” “oh I’m sorry uh where were you?” Jordan paused “uh with a friend.” Lynn stepped back again and spoke “ha oh uh yeah I’m sorry wow I uh didn’t mean to interrupt.” “no, no its ok it uh well I don’t know shit should I not have come?” Jordan combed her hair back with her fingers and Lynn threw her hands up “um I don’t know fuck I thought… I don’t know” “look Lynn I like you” “I know we’re not together ok I do” “stop listen fuck, Lynn yeah I hooked up today and I don’t regret it. I really care about this person mostly as a friend first but I do. You and I aren’t ready for more. we uh we’re fucked up I get it.” “Jordan! You said this happens and I’ll get over it? will I? you haven’t!” “Fuck! Lynn you had a close call scary yes but a fucking close call! Mine wasn’t I wasn’t saved. I wasn’t ok it didn’t almost happen to me! It…” Lynn’s eyes watered “I’m so sorry” Jordan wiped her face with her hands. “no I uh lock the door behind me. I have to go ok I’m really sorry Lynn. I thought I was good for you helping you even, but I’m not a good example ok. Yeah I function now sometimes but not all the time. You need a real sponsor or something ok I’m sorry I have to go bye.” Jordan opened the door and locked the bottom lock. Lynn grabbed her arm “no please don’t, please don’t go! I can’t be alone now J fuck I lied ok! I lied! It wasn’t almost god fuck! I’m sure it wasn’t like you but tell me talk to me please?” Jordan felt a chill and shook. She turned and stared out the front door for a moment then spoke closing the door. “pack a bag Lynn, a couple nights whatever ok? I can’t stay here. You want to talk? come over ok? you have a few minutes’ hurry.” Lynn spoke “ok” Jordan spoke “I uh Lynn actually the thing is I’m having a… well it will be a bad night and you don’t want to see this side. I’m going to have to call Lil or Lou and if you don’t have anyone better you can come with be” Jordan paused then sighed “and watch me loose it basically. But if you need me specifically I suggest going there. I want to protect you but I’m not as strong as you think. So decide now.” “I can’t talk to anyone else but if you don’t want me to go” “I do just ugh hurry I need to go ok” “ok” Lynn walked off to pack her bag.


Jordan got out of the car and Lynn followed. They went into the house. Jordan spoke “uh put your stuff in the guest room I’ll be in the kitchen. Lynn nodded. She went upstairs and dropped her bag off then came down to hear Jordan on the phone “fuck Lil please fuck” Lynn heard her slam her phone on the counter. Lynn sat at the bottom of the stairs. Ten minutes later she looked up to hear a key code being entered on the front door. Lynn raised her head to see Lilly and Lou enter. They went past her to the kitchen. Jordan grabbed the bottle of whisky from the island in front of her. she stepped around the island away from them. She spoke to lilly “ok but don’t take it yet. I haven’t drank any of it yet.” Lilly set her things down and looked at Lou. Lou set his bag down then pulled out an expensive bottle. Lynn walked in he took Lynn’s arm and gently pulled her over in front of him “look J Ok good stuff ha worth drinking. So uh set the bottle down let me make you an old fashioned and we can talk” Jordan spoke nervously “um okay yeah” she set the bottle down and stepped back. Lou began making the drinks. Lilly spoke leaning against the island “so uh who did you fuck? It wasn’t miss Lynn here, Sorry Lynn.” Lynn tried to smile and sat at the bar. Jordan spoke “fuck Lynn sorry uh Stacie.” Lilly spoke “ok well that’s not falling off the wagon completely ok but not great. You having issues with it?” “uh yeah and things just its uh” Lou spoke “almost three years?” “yeah” Lynn was silent as Lou handed them drinks. Lou spoke “what can we do?”  Jordan spoke “I don’t know I’m just losing it. crashing now, I don’t know what to do. I need a distraction. Lynn had been a great friend and helping you helped me. Any chance you want to talk Lynn, Lil and Lou are great listeners too.” Lilly spoke “Lynn we have our things too if you want us to tell you we will. We trust J if she trusts you we do.” Lynn sighed “J you already know kinda you haven’t said anything about you.” Lou cut in “she can’t Lynn” “why?” Lou looked at Jordan then spoke “She signed a confidentiality form.” Lynn spoke “oh um wow ok” Jordan spoke “Lynn what you told me at the house, do you want to talk about it?” she drank the drink and Lou poured another. Lynn spoke “when the security came and found me he had already started. I had lied in group when I said almost. He had already started. It had only been a couple minutes, maybe seconds but…” her voice broke and tears ran down her cheek. Jordan spoke “you need to tell the police.” “they know, they saw, they stopped it. they called earlier they had a match since he got away but uh they wanted me to come down to point him out but I couldn’t. They said the dna is proof but it’d help if I could be a witness. They said they’d hold him till tomorrow 24 hours.” Lilly spoke “trust us it’ll hurt but it’ll feel good to get it over with.” “okay uh I’ll go tomorrow.” Lilly spoke “sorry to be intrusive but did you uh take anything in the hospital? Ya know preventative?” “yeah uh and I’ve been back to the doctor since to be sure. Since its only been four weeks since I still have to go back in a couple more weeks to be sure but she said we should know by now.” Jordan spoke “you would.” Jordan finished her drink and Lou poured her another. Jordan drank and sat up straighter. She took a deep breath and released it then spoke “I want to tell her.” lilly spoke “uh are you sure?” Jordan drank more “uh at least some of it.” Lynn spoke “are you sure J?” Jordan drank more “yeah” Lilly grabbed her bag “Lou take J to change real quick?” Lou nodded as he pulled J up. They left the room. Lilly pulled some folders out of her brief case as she spoke “I thought this may happen so I came prepared.” “oh ok with what?” “look I’ve been J’s friend a long time but uh it started out with me being her lawyer.” “oh” “I need you to sign a confidentiality waver I’m sorry but it’s for both of your protection. If you don’t want to know don’t sign ok?” “of course I will she’s been very protective of me. I only want to do the same.” “thank you” Lilly showed Lynn where to sign and she did without hesitation. A few minutes later Lou came in “hey uh let’s go to the den ok?” they nodded and followed. Jordan was curled up on the couch under a blanket with a glass of whisky. Lou spoke as they all sat and he lit the fire. “um Lil you tell at least start to tell okay?” Lilly nodded as Lou sat. Lilly took a drink and they all followed. Lilly spoke “Jordan was a waitress in a restaurant three years ago. In her down time she would sit and write. One night closing a man came in and hit on her she shot him down. He came back in every night for the next week and she shot him down every time. Not flirting just not interested. Jordan was currently seeing someone a man she hadn’t even had sex with yet. She was trying to be serious and show him that. He didn’t think she could be monogamous. On the eighth day the stranger came back she turned him down again.” Jordan spoke “you uh forgot what happened the night before.” Lilly looked surprised “I thought we couldn’t talk about it? Stacie doesn’t even know that.” Jordan held out her glass to Lou for more and spoke “I’m sure.” Lilly spoke “day seven Jordan’s um boyfriend proposed and they had sex for the first time.” Lynn looked at Jordan “you were engaged?” Jordan closed her eyes and nodded Lilly continued “he had to go out of town on business. But was a jealous guy. So day eight they went to town hall and got married.” Lynn’s jaw dropped as Lilly continued. “Then he left town for work, so that night she went home alone, married. Uh she went to bed and woke up in the middle of the night restrained.” Lilly looked at Jordan to make sure she could continue. Jordan closed her eyes not answering. She took a drink “I need a cigarette please?” Lou pulled one out and lit it he gave it to her. Her hand shook but she smoked and took a drink. She looked back at them all and nodded. Lilly spoke “The man from the restaurant was standing there with three of his friends. They uh all kept her there raped her all night. The next day the three friends left but the man stayed. He stayed for two more days. He kept going kept raping all day both days. Then he untied her threw her in the tub and left. Getting rid of evidence. She called the cops of course and they came. She was released from the hospital the next day and her well husband came home. She didn’t want to tell him so she said it was just a home invasion. He was already upset she hadn’t been answering her phone.” Jordan finished her drink then wiped away a tear. Lynn spoke “oh god I’m so sorry J. I understand more I’m sorry.” Jordan sat her glass down and reached for the bottle. Lou spoke “J?” “Lil I want you to finish but I need the bottle” Lou and Lil looked shocked. Lilly spoke “J? uh really honey I don’t think we should go there.” Lou spoke “J I didn’t think we could talk or mention that?” Lynn spoke “there’s more?” Jordan was softly crying now “it’s what I can’t stop thinking about. What’s hurting me today so please?” lilly spoke “okay J okay of course. Lou give her the bottle.” Lou handed her the bottle and took her other hand squeezing it. She drank and squeezed it back. Lilly finished her drink and poured another. Lynn noticed a pained look on everyone’s face now. Lilly sipped shaking herself now then spoke “three weeks later… Jordan got sick. Uh well she couldn’t keep anything down for days. So she went to the doctor.” Lilly drank Lynn turned to Jordan “you were pregnant?” Jordan nodded. Lilly went to speak but Jordan shook her head. Jordan’s voice broke as she spoke but continued “I uh came home and told him. He didn’t believe it could be from the one first time and we hadn’t again cause he was so busy with work. He said I cheated it was the only way. He wanted a paternity test. uh I didn’t know what to do. I agreed but I had to tell him explain what really happened in case well, in case she wasn’t his. So I told him… ha he didn’t even believe me. He went to the police and they told him.” she paused drinking then continued “He apologized but he uh… he was disgusted. I made it to uh 5 months he wanted the test still. We were told there were small risks but still he wanted it. and I was so depressed I didn’t want to lose him so I agreed.” She paused again blinking back tears. She took another drink “but the test caused a miscarriage. I uh he was supportive I guess then we got the test results back. she was his the whole time. He was so upset he blamed himself for the miscarriage. He asked for a divorce gave me uh a large settlement, which I didn’t ask for. He uh ha basically paid me off not to tell the story. He uh is in politics so he didn’t want this to affect him politically. Then that was it, for the next year and a half I was uh I partied. I drowned my pain in people, alcohol, coke, weed, pills idk anything. Then I kinda started to get it together. Then I met Nat, that was just over a year ago.” Lynn didn’t speak she drank. Jordan spoke “okay take the bottle I’m feeling sick.” Lynn spoke “I’m so sorry god Jordan I’m so sorry.” Jordan spoke “fuck I’m going to be sick I think.” Lou spoke “what can I do?” “uh never mind god Lou I need coke I need an upper please.” Lilly spoke “J honey let’s just talk okay please?” “Lil please or I’ll end up going out and…” Lou spoke “of course okay. We came prepared you’ve been doing pretty good.” Jordan spoke “but not you Lynn okay I’m not going to be the reason for giving you bad habits.” “okay” Lilly nodded “okay Lou you two relax.” He got up and went to the kitchen. Lynn spoke “how’d you meet Lou?” Lou came in with the coke on a tray and a bill rolled. Lou spoke “we’ve been friends for over seven years.” Jordan spoke “we have the same birthday. Met in a bar for my 21st ha our 21st.” Jordan did the line as Lynn and Lilly stared at each other. Lou did the next line. Lynn spoke “did you ever talk to him again? Or uh see him You’re uh husband ex-husband?” “not for a while not in person at least. See him on the news and tv yeah but not spoken. Every once in a while he has someone call to check in asks if I have enough money. Not that he really cares he just probably worries I’ll say something.” “and your attacker? attackers?” “um it’s still under investigation. I’ve found a couple of them they copped pleas but the other two the one who really was the leader they haven’t found.” Lilly’s phone rang “oh uh J well Nat’s been texting. Wanted to make sure you were ok you were supposed to call her?” “oh shit uh yeah I forgot fuck I promised her.” the doorbell rang. Jordan put her head in her hands “oh god” Lou spoke “I’ll take care of it, it’s probably nat.” “no uh I will especially if it is her ok” Lou helped Jordan up. Jordan went to the door. She unlocked it and opened it. Natalie stood there “hey uh oh hi Lou.” She looked in and saw Lynn and Lilly. Natalie spoke “uh wow are you ok?” “um no honestly. I am really sorry I didn’t call you back honestly I didn’t do it intentionally Nat.” Natalie spoke “okay its ok I was worried about you. Um I’ll go” Jordan swayed and caught herself on the door. Nat and Lou stepped forward to help her. Natalie spoke “whoa J you’re uh pretty fucked up like really more than the normal. What’s going on?” “um just messed up okay ha its why you left right I’m fucked up right. I’m a bad person.” “no, no you’re not okay.” “you should go I’m spiraling Nat go.” “I will if you really want me to but this was our problem ok? You can trust me open up to me?” she shook “not tonight Nat ok. I mean you can come in but all I can think is I want to fuck you.” “oh uh wow J you have friends here.” “ha I know.” Lou spoke “J? Lynn’s here come on” “ha we’re telling her all about me come on now she’ll see I’m just a whore right.” Nat came in “no baby you’re not” Nat kissed Jordan. They stepped in the house Jordan looked at the stairs “ha sooo not happening I uh need another line.” Natalie closed the door behind her “wow coke ha” Lilly whispered to Lynn “you may want to do some coke in a minute. Are you going to be ok seeing them?” “ha uh yeah I will honestly. After what I know now I understand crashing needing to escape. Helping her right now has me focused. Tonight or however long whenever. Whatever she needs.” Lilly got up and spoke “Nat, J, Lou come in here ok? Party?” Jordan nodded and smiled trying to balance into the den. She flopped on the couch and smiled “I’m feeling better already all my besties here. Except Stace of course.” Nat frowned “Stacie? Uh you’re talking again?” “uh shit Nat look I told you uh you can go its ok” Nat sat by her “no its okay really you’re ok.” The doorbell rang again. Lilly spoke “shit!” Jordan laughed “oh god no please ha we know who it is.” Lou spoke “do a line okay all of you ha I’ll get it its ok.” Jordan spoke “Lou if it’s her…” Lou spoke “I know” Jordan pulled her knees to her chest and bit her nails. Lou went over and opened the door. Stacie stood there “whoa uh hi wow uh she ok?” “no but well now she’s too fucked up” “I’m sorry we shouldn’t have.” “it’s not you it’s this time of the year. Come in uh get prepared.” Stacie did. Jordan jumped up “uh wow yup I have to go sorry uh” Lilly grabbed her “hey no, no its ok, you’re ok we all love you its ok. No one is mad” “I’m mad Lil I, I feel like I’m choking drowning please.” “no honey you can’t go out.” Jordan’s phone rang. Lilly grabbed her “it’s ok it is ok I will get it ok” “ok” Lilly looked at the phone. She tried to calm herself and put it down “no one its ok” Jordan stepped back smirking she spoke “you’re kidding really?” Jordan went to grab her phone Lilly spoke “hey no, ok no you’re ok.” Jordan spoke “I need you all to leave. I can’t uh see you all seeing me being this weak please really I uh fuck please go.” Lynn came over “hey no ok no listen we can have fun if you want do more lines. I’ll get weed ha drink whatever or we can even go darker ok tell more if we need. Hell I’ll tell everyone here what happened to me if it will help okay.” Jordan spoke “I want to kiss you Lynn and not freak you out or me” “J it’s the one thing fuck ok guess I said I didn’t care who knew. J it was only four weeks ago I was attacked. I am not ready for sex for a kiss for anything, I’m moving on but me in the act I can’t. You however can so uh here.” She handed the rolled bill to Jordan and picked up the tray of coke. Jordan smiled she took it and sniffed the line. Lynn turned to Natalie and she did as well. Stacie came over and her and Lou did. Lilly spoke “Lynn?” Lynn shook her head “I’m ok thanks” Lilly nodded drinking. Lynn sat Jordan in-between Natalie and Stacie she went and grabbed more glasses she sat them down and Lou poured smiling at Lynn. She spoke “Stacie? Hi ha I’m Lynn by the way drink and uh Natalie drink.” They both did. Lynn spoke “now uh Nat?” “uh yeah?” “kiss J” Natalie looked surprised “J is that ok?” Jordan nodded. Natalie kissed her passionately. When they pulled back Lynn spoke “Stacie kiss J” Stacie looked shocked but Jordan turned to her. Stacie happily kissed her. Lynn spoke “see? It’s all ok?” Jordan nodded “now lay back ok relax. I know you won’t sleep from the coke but relax let’s turn the tv on?” Jordan nodded as Lynn did. Lynn sat by Lilly again. Lilly whispered “hell you bull shitted your way through that whole thing huh? Damn ever thought of being a lawyer?” “ha no druggie alcoholic sibling I know how to do this” “oh wow” “when she passes out I have to go. Explain I care but uh I need to work on me ok?” “okay of course” “thanks.” They all sat watching tv and talking soon Jordan fell asleep. Lynn got up as did Stacie. They left. Natalie spoke “should I go or stay?’ Lilly spoke “if you’re still with Dan go” Natalie nodded and left.


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