Lynn unlocked her front door and spoke “so uh wanna crash here?” “Ahhhh no, no thanks” “oh ok” Jordan squeezed Lynn’s hand “do you want me to? Are you scared Lynn?” “uh I wasn’t but…” “um I can’t crash here but do you want to come to my place?” “really?” “yes please” “okay yeah” “ok go grab whatever you need.” “okay thanks” Lynn went into the house and to her room. She grabbed her sweats and a t-shirt. She packed a bag and came out “okay ready” they left to Jordan’s house. They walked up to the large two-story house Lynn paused “uh wow”. “ha uh you ok?” “yeah just wow I mean it’s beautiful.” “ha thanks come on” they walked to the door. Lynn stared at the door “you have a key code on your door?” “uh yeah I um like my privacy” “aren’t you the only one here now?” “yeah” “does Nat still have the code?” “uh no I changed it when she left. she actually only knew it for a week.” “oh I see.” Jordan punched in the code and they entered the house. Lynn looked around surprised “how? I mean ha this is uh how can you afford it?” “um it’s a long story maybe uh someday.” “okay well you can tell me anything you know?” “ha I know just it’s not something I talk about ok? Not even Nat knew. Anyways um so foyer here. Living room to the left. Dining and kitchen straight ahead. Couple spare rooms down here. My rooms upstairs, spare room next to it and my office. You can pick any room.” “ha wow okay ha what if I want your room.” “ha that’s fine come on.” Lynn shook her head “ha I was kidding.” “na come on?” Jordan took Lynn’s hand and they went up the stairs. She spoke directing Lynn “bathroom here if you need and uh this could’ve been your room. If you change your mind it’s here.” They looked in and Lynn laughed “wow” they walked past it to the end of the hall. Jordan turned on the light and entered her room. Lynn stared at the large California king size bed and large room. red and black silk all strewn about. Jordan spoke “bathrooms there go ahead and change okay? look around if you want. Don’t want you getting up and running into something in the middle of the night ha. I’ll be right back okay you want some water? A snack?” “waters good please” “okay I’ll be right back.” “ok” Lynn went into the bathroom and changed quickly. She felt silly in her old sweats and tee in the luxurious house. But she felt happy and comfortable. She looked at the giant Jacuzzi tub and thought how good it’d feel. She went back into the bedroom walking around and staring at all the interesting objects. She looked inside the closet and saw small screens. she realized they were cameras throughout the house. She saw the front door and Jordan in the kitchen. Jordan stood staring at a bottle of alcohol and glass. Jordan put the bottle and glass back then drank some water. Lynn watched Jordan check the alarm then come back to the bottle. Then put the bottle away and checked the alarm again. She did this three more times then finally grabbed the water bottles and came back up the stairs. Lynn stepped away from the closet looking at the dresser. Jordan smiled “hey aww you look cute. Let me change are you tired?” “uh kinda yeah” “well we can watch some tv?” “no its okay” Jordan went into her closet and closed the door. A few moments later Jordan came back in old sweats and a t-shirt too, her hair pulled up in a ponytail and make up wiped off. Lynn stared at how striking Jordan still looked. Jordan spoke moving pillows off the bed and the comforter back. Jordan got in then spoke “get in” “what? Ha” “you wanted my room ha I’m not leaving it’s a big bed we’re friends.” “okay” Lynn got in the bed. Lynn spoke seeing Jordan stay on her side of the bed “ha we’re ok Jordan ok? We’ve fallen asleep together before.” “ha I know but not in my bed” “J are you sure it’s ok? I mean with Nat and you?” “uh she wants kinda to get back together but she was drunk.” Jordan looked at her phone pushing buttons and Lynn saw lights throughout the house go off and in her room. they both laid back facing each other. Lynn spoke “Jordan uh thanks” “for?” “being a great friend through this whole thing. Do you think I’ve over reacted?” “no, no not at all ok Lynn someone, even if it’s a high, asshole, addict patient of yours. He almost raped you, so whatever you have to do and go through its ok.” “thank you J” “shhh go to sleep” “night” “night” they both closed their eyes and fell asleep.
The next morning Lynn felt Jordan moving waking up. She slowly opened her eyes to see Jordan. Jordan smiled “morning beautiful” “morning” “hungry?” “ha uh well yeah actually ha how am I not hung over?” “ha uh I’m a professional you drank lots of water.” “wow thank you uh how do you feel?” “okay let’s get you something.” “ha no I can go get myself something” “no, no I’ll make breakfast okay uh power omelet spinach, mushrooms, tomatoes, maybe some toast?” “sounds great” Jordan paused fighting the urge to kiss Lynn. Lynn spoke “um so last night you fought the urge to what?” Jordan smirked “no reading my mind let’s eat” Lynn blushed “okay”
They ate breakfast. Jordan spoke “thanks for coming last night. My friends loved you and I’m so proud of you for getting out.” “me too suddenly a lot less scary out there in the world now that I’ve been in it again.” “good Lynn, good” Lynn stood “well I better let you get to well work ha” Jordan stood too “ha no, no okay um what are you doing today?” “ha nothing sleeping” “um stay?” “stay?” Jordan took Lynn’s hand “yeah stay the day with me” “ha I need a shower J” “I have a shower” “ha I need clothes” “why?” “J?” “I mean you can wear what you’re wearing or an outfit of mine. Ha could be fun.” “um okay sure.” The doorbell rang Jordan jumped “um on sec” Jordan went to the door. She looked at the camera and saw Natalie she spoke to herself “shit”. She unlocked it and opened it. Natalie spoke “you changed the code you’re so paranoid.” “what do you want Nat?” “you” Jordan didn’t say anything. Natalie frowned “can I come in J?” “uh it’s not a good time” Natalie laughed “ha she’s here still” “it’s not like that” “how did you even meet her” “stop none of your business Nat” “you met her at one of your meetings which one? Alcohol? Pills? Sex addiction? Ha what?” “it’s not my place to say.” “ha yeah sure.” Lynn spoke from behind Jordan “sexual abuse victims” Jordan opened the door more and she and Natalie stared. Natalie sighed “so she knows and I still don’t” Lynn spoke “no I don’t know, but she knows about my issues.” Jordan spoke “Natalie there’s no need to talk about it ok.” “there is if whatever happened is obviously still affecting you.” “um look maybe we can talk another time ok?” “promise you’ll call me J?” “yes I promise ok” Natalie spoke “okay bye sorry Lynn bye” Lynn gave a slight wave as Jordan closed the door. Jordan spoke “well uh that killed the mood huh?” “ha no” “yeah it did Lynn” Jordan walked off into her kitchen. Lynn sighed “oh” Lynn went upstairs and grabbed her stuff. Jordan came in as Lynn put her shoes on “Lynn? What are you doing I thought we were spending the day here?” “well you made it clear the mood changed I thought I should go?” “oh uh I see yeah ok” “so thanks for having me over.” “anytime” Lynn went to walk off. Jordan frowned and took Lynn’s arm pulling her to her “look Lynn I don’t want you to go but it’s probably best ok?” “um ok then why are you holding me?” they smiled Jordan spoke “because I don’t want to let you go. I want to kiss you Lynn.” “J? ha I know we both think hell we know this would be a bad idea. You’re a great friend J.” “Lynn I’m not ready and you’re not ready either we need to be friends. I don’t want to lose you.” “I don’t want to lose you either” “okay hug me so you can go” “ok” they hugged. They both felt the ache to take more from the other. They held on for a bit then let go. Jordan walked Lynn to the door and Lynn hailed a cab and left.
Jordan dialed a number “hey Stace?” “Jordan what’d you do? You haven’t called in a while.” “ha well I’m uh having a hard time I need my sponsor” “okay what’s up? Do you wanna meet or I can come to you?” “no don’t come can we uh talk on the phone? Ha I don’t trust myself alone with someone right now” “J? what’s up dude we can meet in a public place?” “uh fuck ok Stace but uh ok twenty at high 5?” “yeah ok” “k bye”
Jordan walked up seeing Stacie in a short orange dress that flared at her hip. Jordan bit her lip then hugged Stacie “fuck Stace couldn’t put on something that wouldn’t make this harder on me?” “ha sorry I thought you weren’t having sex cravings anymore?” they sat at a table “ha well I wasn’t but I don’t know. So Nat and I split and I had met someone in my abuse meeting. I can’t fucking stop thinking about her Stace. She’s great I want to protect her. I have been ok. Then last night…” “did you do your holiday dance?” “yeah and uh she watched.” “so now you’re craving her?” “yeah but we’re friends and I don’t want to ruin that. She’s not ready for sex anyways and I haven’t since Nat, but damn I uh I think I need to get it out of my system?” “okay pick one person then not a new one every night J” “fuck I know” “take a breath J it’ll be okay” Jordan leaned back and smiled “okay let’s get a drink Stace” “okay” they both ordered. Jordan spoke “look why don’t you and I get a hotel room Stace?” “ha no J I uh we can’t” “you don’t want to?” “I do want to you know that uh I just can’t just hook up with you though.” Jordan took Stacie’s hand as the waitress dropped off the whisky for and glass of wine for Stacy. Jordan spoke “Stacie hey you aren’t just a booty call okay? I really care about you, but it had to stop I was dating Natalie and we said we weren’t serious” “I know, I know but you’re not ready to date now.” “no, I’m not I’m sorry. Uh but if you want we can have fun. I’m not going anywhere I’m still your friend.” “ha ok well good to know.” Jordan’s phone buzzed she saw a message from Lynn “hey you just checking if you’re okay?” “yeah fine you ok?” “yeah thanks” “ok” Jordan put her phone away “you have all my attention Stace” “ha thanks so um how’s the paranoia?” “it’s not paranoia Stace you are one of three people who know it’s not.” “Jordan hey I’m not judging just you know you’re safe now ok? It’s been a long time” “It’s been uh three years almost coming up in a few days.” “oh yeah that’s it huh?” “probably, then I met you a year and a half ago and yeah It was getting good but then it was this time last year I met Nat probably why I fell so hard. I mean I care and still do for her but well. It’s just a lot and the uh not that I want to tell Lynn’s story it’s not my place but she knows how I feel though.” “hey as do I, that’s why I wasn’t trying to judge.” “I don’t want to keep going over this please? I mean I know I called you my sponsor but I think the over thinking is the problem.” “I honestly agree with that. Jordan put your thoughts into your writing again” “I know, I know I will but uh today? Cheers?” “J you do understand this is not a fix and we know you can’t give into one addiction to suppress another” “ha alcohol and sex is two addictions for one” “that’s worse” “I know just need today need to move forward, besides you do know you’re not my actual sponsor right ha” “I know but we met in group and ha I tried to be your sponsor before uh we uh happened” “ha I know thanks” “but seriously have you found a new sponsor?” “Stacie I’m just not into talking to someone else and sharing k” Stacie held up her hands in surrender “ok then” Jordan finished her drink then spoke “want another drink?” “yeah sure” Jordan waved over the waitress and ordered another for each of them. Stacie spoke “so obviously you’re drinking taking anything else?” “no-no ha. I almost wish but no. no drugs of any kind other than alcohol and a cigarette here and there. I uh think helping this friend has kept my mind off of doing things.” “yeah I understand that.” “anyways sorry how have you been Stace?” “good” “I’m sorry are you still with Arthur?” “ha no, no um he only lasted a month then there was Rene and then Lisa ha now no one.” “whoa Stace trying to break my record?” “ha no I didn’t sleep with any of them. There was a gap in between each of them I actually have been pretty good about the sex.” “well good, good.” They finished their drinks. Jordan spoke “well um I guess I better let you get back to your life.” “J? uh come over for a drink?” Jordan paused “look Stace you just said you were doing good with the no sex and I uh don’t want to ruin that.” “ha you know it’s about not having meaningless sex. And not with every person you ever meet. And not while you’re on so many drugs you can’t remember.” “yeah I know Stace.” “so will you come over for a drink?” “uh yeah let’s go” Jordan stood up then helped Stacie up. Jordan opened her wallet and threw down some bills. They walked off getting a cab.
Jordan and Stacie sat on Stacie’s couch kissing. Jordan’s hands grazed Stacie’s legs and pulled them up onto her lap. Stacie ran her hands up Jordan’s shirt rubbing her nipples. Jordan moaned pulling back some “hey uh maybe I should go.” “oh uh if you want?” “ha no I don’t want to Stace” “then come here” they kissed. Jordan spoke “mmm Stace are you sure about this?” “yeah I am J” They began kissing again. Jordan leaned Stacie back on the couch and got on top of her. They kissed passionately rubbing against each other. Stacie moaned taking Jordan’s hand and putting it up her dress. “J? I want you inside me” Jordan ran her hands up the inside of Stacie’s thigh and heard her phone ring. She looked over and saw Lynn’s name. She paused and looked back at Stacie. Stacie rolled her eyes “okay ha answer it” Jordan sighed “sorry” “it’s ok” Jordan sat up and answered her phone “hi uh are you ok?” “um are you busy?” “it’s ok Lynn, what’s up are you really ok?” “um I just uh was uh over thinking I think. I heard a noise on my balcony.” “did you check?” “yeah there’s no one there then I just started panicking.” “are you going to be ok?” “uh yeah, yeah I’m sorry. um can I see you later?” “yeah maybe I’ll hit you up okay? Let me know if you need anything else.” “okay thanks sorry bye” “anytime don’t be sorry bye” Jordan hung up. Then looked back at Stacie who was sitting up. Jordan dropped the phone on the floor and kneeled back over the couch kissing Stacie. Stacie spoke “mmm J no you’ll be thinking of her.” Jordan laughed getting up she pulled Stacie up to stand and close against her. “Stace I would only be thinking of you. Look at you beautiful. You’re sexy, smart and I want you. If you don’t want to we’ll go grab a bite or a movie or anything you want. Let’s do this right this time ok maybe not a relationship but a real friendship okay.” “yeah sounds like a great idea.” “okay so what would you like to do?” Jordan kissed Stacie then waited for her response. Stacie smile “mmm okay yes stay?” “you sure you’re ready?” “yeah you?” “ha very baby” Jordan kissed Stacie and led her to her bedroom.